The Curious Insight

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  • Too often, execution breaks down because it ignores frontline friction. The reflex is often to treat non-compliance as defiance or disengagement, when in reality, it’s often a signal.

    Leaders often launch new strategies with high hopes, only to end up managing compliance rather than enabling real change. The challenge isn’t crafting a compelling vision; it’s ensuring that the vision can be adopted and implemented by the people closest to the work.

    Richard Rumelt, in his landmark book Good Strategy, Bad Strategy, wrote: 

    “The most common path to bad strategy is avoiding the hard work of diagnosing the real problem.” 

    When we skip diagnosis, we focus on what should happen instead of what is happening. Leaders create roadmaps and KPIs only to watch execution stall. And when reality pushes back, the assumption is that people aren’t trying hard enough. 

    In truth, most people want to do good work. If they aren’t, something’s making it difficult: broken tools, unclear goals, misaligned incentives, or systemic friction. 

    A Story from Education: Teachers and New Curriculum Mandates

    A school district introduces a new curriculum with detailed plans and strict milestones to boost test scores. Months later, administrators notice some teachers are behind, skipping content, or improvising in ways that differ from the original plan.

    The typical response is might be enforcement:

    “Why aren’t you following the curriculum?”

    But if dedicated teachers are struggling, a better question is:

    “What’s getting in the way of teaching this effectively?”

    When administrators ask this, real barriers emerge: the curriculum may be too rigid for diverse classrooms, students may have knowledge gaps, materials might arrive late, or teachers may lack sufficient training to fully grasp the new approach.

    The issue isn’t a lack of commitment; it’s that the strategy didn’t reflect classroom realities. By asking the right questions, leaders discover true obstacles and enable real progress.

    The Strategy Testing Loop

    Instead of enforcing compliance immediately, we can test our strategy against real-world constraints.

    1. Observe: Where is the strategy failing to take root?
    2. Diagnose: What’s making execution difficult?
    3. Adapt: Remove friction, provide support, adjust direction
    4. Repeat: Strategy is dynamic. So is alignment.

    This approach reframes resistance as insight. It’s about raising awareness of what the work actually requires.

    Strategy as a Conversation: Unlocking Sustainable Progress

    Let’s compare two approaches to the same issue:

    • Compliance lens: “You’re not following the policy. Fix it.”
    • Testing lens: “What’s getting in your way?”

    Once barriers such as technical debt, brittle architecture, or unclear incentives surface, execution improves organically. When leaders treat resistance as information, they build trust and unlock progress without pressure.

    Practical Steps to Begin

    Start building a more adaptive, grounded approach to strategy execution:

    1. Try Wardley Mapping: Map a product or process with your team to spot misalignments early.
       https://learnwardleymapping.com/introduction/
    2. Practice Systems Thinking: Ask, “What’s really going on here?” Look for patterns and connections.
       https://thesystemsthinker.com/systems-thinking-what-why-when-where-and-how/
    3. Build Trust:Share your maps and insights. Invite critique. Encourage open dialogue and collaborative problem solving.
    4. Celebrate Progress: Recognize even small shifts. Change often scales when momentum builds.

    Key Takeaways

    • Resistance is often feedback, not a people problem.
    • Use non-compliance as data, not a verdict.
    • Remove blockers instead of pushing for alignment.

    Bottom Line: Align strategy with ground truth


    Strategy is real only when it survives contact with reality.

    If a strategy doesn’t survive contact with real constraints, it’s not failing; it’s incomplete. The best leaders listen, adapt, and rework their strategies when teams struggle. Sustainable progress comes from asking better questions, not pushing harder.

    To go beyond compliance, listen with understanding; often, we can learn what’s working and what’s possible.

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  • During an effective speaking course, I faced a surprising challenge: I couldn’t stop talking within the 2-minute limit because my thoughts flowed like a mind map, and I felt every idea was essential. I believed I had to share all these thoughts and connect the dots at the end, so being cut short seemed to defeat the purpose. Frustrated, I asked my instructor for advice, and he told me to start with the main idea and only share what truly supports it. That moment was a game-changer. Suddenly, my message became clearer, simpler, and more concise, giving my audience the chance to engage and ask questions where needed.

    Today, we’re drowning in information but starving for clarity. In a world of endless meetings, overflowing inboxes, and constant notifications, brevity has become the most valuable communication skill. Smart communicators understand this: they don’t write more to sound impressive; they write less to be understood.

    Why brevity matters?

    • It respects people’s time.
    • It reduces overload, friction, and confusion.
    • It builds trust faster.
    • It turns passive readers into active listeners.

    Whether we’re writing an email, leading a team, or presenting an idea, less is often more.

    To get better at keeping it short, we can ask:

    • Can this be said in fewer words?
    • Will this be easy to act on?

    The Practice:

    1. Start with the point: Don’t build up. Lead with what matters.
    2. Cut filler words: Words like “actually,” “just,” “I think,” and “in order to” usually add nothing.
    3. Use structure: Bullets, bold lines, and short paragraphs improve readability.
    4. Know your audience and edit like you care: Because your audience does.
    5. Use simple and precise language: Convey your message clearly, concisely, and consistently.

    Brevity isn’t about leaving things out, it’s about knowing what’s essential.

    Antoine de Saint-Exupéry once said:

    “Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.”

    Smart communication is about being understood, not saying more.

    Focus on what matters, speak with intention, and watch your ideas connect and inspire.

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  • Feedback is more than just content; it’s also a delivery system.

    That’s why it’s vital to consider how the recipient thinks and processes information.

    Imagine a team member is missing deadlines. Here’s how you might tailor your feedback to their unique style:

    • For an analytical, data-driven person: “I’ve noticed that you’ve missed 3 of the last 7 deliverables. Can we talk about what’s contributing to that?”
    • For a relational, people-oriented person: “I know you care deeply about how your work impacts others. When tasks slip, it puts pressure on the rest of the team. Let’s talk about what’s going on.”

    While the core message remains the same, the feedback is customized to address what each person values most.

    Which approach feels more natural to you?

    This reminds me of a great explanation by Dave Mitchell who uses the archetypes of the Romantic and the Warrior to illustrate different communication styles:

    • The Romantic: Romantics filter information through an emotional lens, always considering the emotional impact of their words. Their goal is harmony and peace, so they tend to communicate indirectly. For them, the actual words matter less as the words are chosen carefully to avoid upsetting others, and much of the real meaning is conveyed through nonverbal cues-like facial expressions (e.g., a raised eyebrow), tone, and pace. They respond best to feedback that is delivered with empathy, care, and attention to their feelings.
    • The Warrior: Warriors focus on results, efficiency, and getting things done. Their communication style is direct and unambiguous. For Warriors, words mean exactly what they say – no hidden agenda, no emotional subtext. Tone and facial expressions are secondary; clarity and action are everything. They prefer straightforward, unambiguous communication and are comfortable with criticism if it helps achieve goals. When giving or receiving feedback, Warriors want clear, concise, and actionable messages, without emotional cushioning or unnecessary details.

    Even when we understand these differences, we often default to our own preferred communication style. Analytical people tend to give data-heavy feedback, empathetic people cushion their critiques, and direct communicators get straight to the point.

    The main idea is that effective feedback and communication focus on the other person. The right approach depends on how the recipient processes information and emotions.

    Here are some techniques to help match the recipient’s style:

    • Observe their language: Do they ask for data? Do they talk about feelings, outcomes, or people?
    • Notice how they give feedback: People often give feedback the way they prefer to receive it.
    • Ask directly: “What kind of feedback is most useful to you?”

    In conclusion, to achieve better results, build trust, and reduce resistance, adapt your feedback to fit the recipient’s style. This simple shift that can make your feedback more effective and well received.

    Link to clip: https://youtu.be/SJxHW6GtdbE

    Direct vs. Indirect Communication: Understanding “The Warrior” and “The Romantic” Archetypes

    Photo by Yura Timoshenko on Unsplash

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  • Real change starts with the early adopters. We just need the first believer.

    Every new idea enters the world to the sound of silence. Sometimes it’s met with thoughtful curiosity, a few encouraging nods, or even healthy questions.

    Then something exciting happens; someone leans in. Their eyes light up with understanding. They’re energized. They ask insightful questions and return the next day with a prototype, a plan, or simply a burst of momentum.

    That’s the early adopter: someone who not only agrees, but takes action.

    The Diffusion of Innovations theory highlights these early adopters as the 13.5% who help turn possibilities into progress. In real-world teams, they’re the ones who move first, inspiring others while consensus is still forming.

    Movements don’t begin with mandates. They begin with belief.

    Early adopters don’t just “agree”. They act. That’s what sets them apart.

    When you introduce a new idea and encounter hesitation, see it as an opportunity. Find the person who’s already inspired, and take the first step together to ignite innovation and momentum.

    Questions to consider:

    • Have you ever been excited about a new idea or tool before others? What was it?
    • What’s one way you encourage others to try new things?

    • When you introduce a new idea, who usually shows interest first?

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  • There is a saying among the Igbo people: “eto ogiri osi we isi” (praise the fermented locust bean soup spice and it will ooze a strong smell/scent/aroma) and another, “eto dike na nke omere, omekwa ozo” (praise the hero for what they have done, so that they may do more or they will do it again). Though their meanings can be quite conflicting depending on interpretation, these proverbs remind us of the importance of genuine recognition and appreciation.

    I recall an exercise where we were asked to give honest and sincere appreciation to someone else. Afterwards, we reflected on a few questions:

    • Do you find it easier to give or receive appreciation?
    • How did you feel giving appreciation?
    • How did you feel receiving appreciation?

    Some of us found it much easier to give appreciation than to receive it. However, this raised an important question: How often do we truly offer sincere appreciation to those around us?

    I once read that appreciation is “food for the soul.” When we only feed the body and forget the soul, people can still feel empty inside.

    Here’s one simple way to make our appreciation truly meaningful:

    Be specific. The more specific we are in our appreciation, the less likely it is to come across as empty flattery.

    Here are a few ideas for what to appreciate:

    – Things: People are often proud of the things they own or have created.

    – Achievements: Recognize accomplishments-whether in studies, research, or projects that required significant effort.

    – Personal Traits: Highlighting unique and positive characteristics makes our appreciation heartfelt and meaningful.

    – Evidence: Backing our appreciation with concrete examples adds credibility and shows our observations are genuine.

    Danielle Pierre once said, “Recognition is the heart’s way of saying, ‘I see you, and you matter.’” Similarly, William Arthur Ward reminds us that, “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”

    Let’s make it a habit to nourish the souls of those around us with sincere and thoughtful appreciation, inspiring a positive workplace culture and a better world.

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  • This is love:

    To lay down one’s life for a friend, figuratively or not;

    Even greater, to lay down one’s life for a stranger;

    To know what it takes to bring about a new life and choose to do it anyway;

    To know what it takes to raise a helpless one and choose to do it anyway;

    To see ways out of suffering and choose it anyway;

    To not feel like doing it and choose to do it anyway;

    To shield young ones from the scorching sun or keep them warm from the pouring rain;

    This is love:

    To choose to love;

    A deliberate, intentional, and ever-demanding choice or decision;

    To sacrifice one’s interests, plans, feelings, and ultimately “self” for something not so pleasant on the surface;

    To go to the house of those mourning instead of a house of those feasting;

    To give kindness, patience, gracious words, acts of service, gifts, and compassion to those on our paths;

    To leave the feeling for a moment and just do;

    To choose “self” last, for there’s nothing greater than this;

    To give, for it’s only in giving that we can receive.

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  • Coming soon…

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  • Whether it’s at the end of a sad movie, due to the death of a loved one, or because of a recent heartbreak, crying is a universal human emotion that we have all experienced at one point or another. However, crying is not limited to pain. It is not uncommon for a parent to shed tears of joy at a wedding for their beloved son or daughter. Neither is it uncommon to see two siblings crying in the middle of a heated argument. So why is it that something so versatile in its function gets such a bad reputation? Is there a secret hierarchy of emotional expression that only some of us are aware of?

    Crying is commonly seen as a form of emotional expression – the body’s natural physical response to a particular emotion, often communicating to others how one feels. But for many, such as myself, crying is also a form of emotional processing. Whenever I am experiencing intense and overwhelming emotions, my body seems to naturally react by producing tears. Not only is this process cathartic, but it also allows me to physically release emotions that I may otherwise struggle to process, serving as a tool for emotional regulation. Much like the high after a good workout, crying offers a similar release of emotions. In fact, studies suggest that tears release stress hormones from the body and may help regulate stress levels by releasing various “feel good” hormones such as endorphins and oxytocin. It is not surprising that many experience elevated moods after a good crying session.

    Despite its established functionality and benefits, crying is often viewed negatively. Stereotypes like crying is a weakness, a form of manipulation, or a sign of high emotional reactivity, are commonly attached to it. Gender and societal norms play a big role when it comes to understanding where such beliefs come from.

    Men are often told from a young age that “boys don’t cry.” Such statements play a key role in shaping our beliefs about crying and its acceptability. Telling young boys to not cry reinforces the idea that crying is a sign of weakness and not a socially acceptable behaviour for men. When in fact crying can have various benefits, including releasing stress, promoting emotional healing, communicating one’s thoughts and feelings, and fostering social connections. By suppressing their emotions and refusing to cry, men may struggle to process, regulate, and express their emotions effectively, potentially resulting in a range of psychological and emotional issues. Men who are discouraged from crying may also struggle to empathize with others who express their emotions in this way.

    Thankfully, with current discussions on topics of emotional intelligence and mental health, there is now a greater emphasis on normalizing men expressing their emotions in ways that were previously unacceptable. However, despite the good intentions behind this movement, it appears to also have some negative side effects.  Some men now feel pressured to show emotions through crying, even when they have no desire to do so. Some may feel as if they are being asked to express themselves in a specific way not because they need it but because someone else has a desire for it. If someone were to express their emotions in a very specific way to make others feel better, then their emotional expression isn’t for them, it’s for others. This can create complex situations, as societal norms and personal beliefs can collide, leaving some men feeling conflicted and unsure about how to be expressive without compromising authenticity.

    The seemingly opposing responses to ongoing discussions about the acceptability of crying and other forms of emotional expressions show that we need to expand our thinking to recognize and accept the perspective of others, rather than viewing our own behaviours or patterns as the best option. The discussion around the acceptability and functionality of crying is not limited to gender, it encompasses all humans with their unique personalities, thoughts, and experiences.

     Whereas some individuals feel comfortable or satisfied with crying as a form of emotional expression, others may not find the experience as fulfilling. Instead, they may feel ashamed for not being able to emote in a way we now deem acceptable and often encourage. Forcing someone to express their emotions in a specific way is not healthy. We already know that coercing individuals to conform to our standards of emotional expression has never resulted in positive outcomes.

    Similarly, those who feel pressured to express their emotions by crying must not be resistant to the push for making the act acceptable and normalized for everyone regardless of gender, age, and culture. There are plenty of individuals who need this societal acceptance to be authentic to who they are and express themselves without fear of judgment.

    Whether crying is the best form of emotional expression, or whether it is even possible to create a hierarchy of emotional expression, is a great question for philosophical debate, but not for practice or understanding. Instead of ranking emotional expressions, it is more important to acknowledge that different methods of expressing emotions can be useful and effective for different people and situations. Despite being a universal form of expression, crying can serve various purposes. By understanding how it serves us and those around us, and also accepting that it may not serve everyone in the same way, we can develop higher collective emotional intelligence and better support each other.For a more in-depth discussion on the topic, along with personal anecdotes and realizations, be sure to check out podcast Episode 1: Is Crying the Best Form of Emotional Expression?

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  • Let’s say you know the outcome of something before doing it based on prior experiences or data. Someone comes along claiming that is untrue and, for whatever reason, you decide to believe them. It turns out to be exactly what you thought initially. What can be said about you in this situation?

    • Were you being optimistic?
    • Was it a self-fulfilling prophecy?
    • Were you naive to buy into the false truth?
    • Were you just a fool? Or were you wise enough to consider the situation and choose to trust the other person?
    • Why did you decide to trust the other person? Could it be because you doubted yourself or didn’t want to be labelled “stubborn”, “dogged”, “stiff-necked”, “rigid” or “strong-headed”?


    All this mental turmoil is because this new barber (cool guy) didn’t listen to me, and now I have bumps on the back of my head.

    Consider this incident: Your favourite barber is out of town, so you have to try a new one. The new barber turns out to be a cool, chatty guy with a beautiful family. At the end of the haircut, he suggests using the skin fade clipper to make the back of your head smoother, but you remember that you have sensitive skin and mention that you get bumps when the clipper or razor blade is used. He insists that was false, saying, “It’s because the other barbers were not gentle with soft touches, and a razor blade would be fine.” For some reason, you choose to allow him, only to regret it later. Now, you have to explain to him how wrong he was while suffering the consequences.

    A story of my life.

    This incident highlights the complexities of trust, influence, and persuasion. Although trusting others is essential, it’s equally vital to balance that with critical thinking and personal experience, underscoring the value of evidence-based decision-making. It’s a reminder to trust our informed instincts while remaining open to new perspectives, ensuring those perspectives are grounded in reality.

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  • Welcome to The Curious Insight!

    We are thrilled to have you join us on this journey of exploration and discovery. Our passion is to delve into the fascinating world of ideas, uncovering hidden gems and bringing new and old perspectives to light. Whether you’re passionate about work, intriguing ideas, or the human sciences, we believe you’ll discover something to ignite your curiosity.

    Our team of writers and thinkers is dedicated to providing you with well-researched articles, thought-provoking essays, and engaging stories that will inspire and inform. We believe that curiosity is the driving force behind innovation and progress, and we aim to foster a community of inquisitive minds who are eager to learn, grow and lead better lives.

    Stay tuned for regular updates, and make sure to subscribe to our newsletter so you never miss a post.

    Happy reading!

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